Eva Amurri Describes How Pregnancy After a Miscarriage Feels

May 17th 2016

Laura Donovan

Getting pregnant after a miscarriage can be bittersweet for many women. Actress Eva Amurri, a mother of one who is pregnant with her second child, understands the conflicting feelings that this particular situation can bring.

Amurri wrote in a recent blog post that while her current pregnancy is definitely exciting, it doesn't counteract the pain of the miscarriage she suffered a year after giving birth to her first daughter, Marlowe Martino.

"I think there’s a misconception that once a woman conceives after a Miscarriage, that somehow her Miscarriage is erased – that the feelings of loss are replaced by feelings of joy for this new baby, and that everything moves forward as it should be," Amurri wrote. "In my own experience, this couldn’t be further from the truth." — Eva Amurri

She described experiencing a wave of fear that she "would never again have a healthy child," adding that she felt very misunderstood in the aftermath. Amurri wrote that she was told she would have another baby later on down the road, not realizing that the baby she wanted was the one she miscarried:

"I think [other people] hoped that time would heal, that after a period of grieving I would be all better and that it was best to wait it out. I got a lot of 'reminders' that I would 'have another baby', that 'it just wasn’t meant to be', or reassurances that I would 'eventually' have the family that I wanted. What I wanted to tell these people was that I didn’t want 'another' baby. I wasn’t interested in their 'meant to be'. I was interested in the baby that I had, the one that I loved and was waiting for. THAT ONE is the one that I wanted, and that one is the one that I would never have." — Eva Amurri

Given the heartbreak she experienced from her miscarriage, getting pregnant afterward was scary, but she is actively fighting the fear of loss everyday:

"When I’m scared, I speak to my Son – I encourage him to stay with us, and tell him how much we are longing to hold him and to welcome him in to our family. We have plans for our Boy, and no matter what happens, I’m so grateful for the full heart I feel today."

Many commenters thanked Amurri for opening up about miscarriages, which affect up to 20 percent of clinical pregnancies:

Happily Eva After comments

Read Amurri's full blog post here.

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