This Dad's Reaction to His Son's Bisexuality Is Going Viral

September 10th 2015

Laura Donovan

Bisexuals are less likely than gays or lesbians to come out, according to research. Tumblr user Destiel My Timelord, however, opened up to his dad about being bisexual and received a hilarious, non-judgmental response.

The Tumblr user published this exchange on the blogging platform and it quickly went viral, with dozens of other users reblogging and sharing the post:


Trying to Explain my Sexuality to my Dad

Me: Okay, so I would identify as bisexual.
Dad: And that means you would have a male partner.
Me: Yep.
Dad: Or a female partner.
Me: Yep.
Dad: And that means you're bi.
Me: Yep.
Dad: So that means if you don't find a partner you're on standbi?
Me: Did you just

As noted by Bustle, the father's clever comment was an example of a "dad joke," which Urban Dictionary describes as an "indescribably cheesy and/or dumb joke made by a father to his children." While the dad's response might come off as silly, it is significant. In the LGBT community, those who identify as bisexual come out in fewer numbers, because they're afraid of being judged. This particular reaction shows this dad is accepting of his kid's sexuality.

Bisexuality in the public eye.

Over the summer, popular YouTube personality Shane Dawson came out as bisexual in a 14-minute video for his 6 million plus subscribers. He confesses that he told his family about his feelings for boys at a young age. However, they weren't accepting, which prompted him to shut down, overeat, gain weight, and aim to be invisible. By age 18, he was 400 pounds as a result of the repression. Once he lost the weight, however, he started posting videos on YouTube, his outlet for creativity.

"Then I became Shane Dawson, and I became the guy that everybody called gay, and I was so defensive of it ... so I just kept repressing the feelings," he says. "And then around [age] 21, I had my first kiss, and it was with a girl. I felt something ... I felt love and I was like, 'Oh, I'm not gay, at all.' So I started dating girls."

In the clip, Dawson says he wishes he could just be gay so people would accept him more.

"You know, I've always wished that I was gay—that I was just 100-percent gay—for so many reasons," Dawson says. "Number one, that means I would know who I was; number two, it would be a lot easier for me to be accepted by people because, you know, I wear wigs and dresses on the internet, and I'm feminine, and all of these things—and it'd be so much easier to just be like, 'Oh yeah, I'm gay.' But I'm not. I mean, I'm not completely gay."

The video has been viewed more than 6 million times and Dawson received tons of support from his followers on social media.

According to research from a 2013 Pew survey, people who identify as bisexual are far less likely to come out than those who are gay or lesbian, and only more than a quarter of bisexuals say that all or the majority of the important people in their lives are aware of their bisexuality.

In a long New York Times Magazine article published last year, writer Benoit Denizet-Lewis argued this lack of strong identity among bisexuals "feeds into a belief among some gays and lesbians that bisexuals are essentially fence-sitters who can pass for straight for decades at a time and aren’t especially invested in the L.G.B.T. community."

Robyn Ochs, a bisexual activist and speaker, told Denizet-Lewis for the piece that she was aware of her bisexuality in college but chose not to come out due to fear of judgment from lesbians.

"They said that bisexuals couldn’t be trusted, that they would inevitably leave you for a man," she said. "[F]or me to say I was a lesbian would have required that I dismiss all of my previous attractions to men as some sort of false consciousness. So I didn’t come out."

According to Pew's findings, bisexuals reported fewer instances of discrimination than gays and lesbians, but the stigma of bisexuality remains a painful reality for many. Earlier this year, Vogue came under fire for a cover story the publication did on openly bisexual supermodel/actress Cara Delevingne. In the piece, Delevingne divulged she'd been confused about her sexuality since childhood but that her parents think her bisexuality is just a phase. Vogue was heavily criticized for writing that her mom and dad "may be correct" about her bisexuality.

Delevingne, who is currently dating musician Annie Clark (also known as St. Vincent), confronted this suggestion by telling the New York Times, "My sexuality is not a phase. I am who I am."