Justice

A Domestic Abuse Victim Has a Message That's Being Heard Around the World

Blogger Emma Murphy published a heartbreaking video on Monday detailing her experiences with domestic abuse. The Irish mother of two explains with a black eye that she has finally left her partner, who punched her in the face when she confronted him about his philandering.

 

I thought long and hard before posting this video, this is very difficult for me but I have to do what is RIGHT, if you...

Posted by Emma Murphy on Monday, July 6, 2015

"I've been thinking long and hard and contemplating whether to post this video," she says. "I finally decided after a lot of thinking that yeah, I need to do this for me and my children. I need to raise awareness to other women out there. I'm 26, I'm from Dublin, I have two children. I've been in a relationship for three and a half years with a guy who I thought was the love of my life. He was the love of my life. I loved him with all my heart. We've had ups and downs, I've cherished the ups, I won't miss the downs. Unfortunately last year, I found out he cheated on me with one of his clients. And found out in June, but he denied it. She contacted me in November and told me she was pregnant. So with the stress I went into labor early. My world was torn upside down, as you can imagine."

Because of this and the love Murphy had for her partner, she "tried to forgive him" and took him back. Then he cheated again.

"On Father's Weekend, he didn't see us," she says. "He spent his time with somebody else ... So I went to the gym and I confronted him. And he denied it of course, and when I threw his phone, he punched me in the face. And it wasn't the first time. Last year he split my head open at an event, and prior to that he punched me as well and I had a black eye. And for the last year and a half, I've been told I'm paranoid. I'm a psycho. I'm nuts. My insecurities will kill me one day. Even up until now, he tells me that my insecurity is going to kill me. And you know what? ... I finally realized that no, this is not acceptable. No man has any right to put his hand on a woman ... Now that I've realized that, I've had the courage to walk away and to go straight to my family and friends and people who love me. I have the courage to actually do something about it this time because even once, it's unacceptable, but to be made feel that it is acceptable is even worse. To be mentally tortured or told you're paranoid and insecure, that's mental torture, and no man should do that to anyone."

Through tears, she said, "So now I'm a single mother of two ... and unfortunately when they ask where their daddy is, he's not going to be around. He's not going to be here for them anymore. Our lives are completely torn apart and they're going to know that their daddy hit their mommy, and that's not something children should see at all ... So if anyone out there has gone through something similar to what I've gone through, you need to find the courage and get away from anything as unhealthy as violence. Go to your friends and family, people who love you and care about you, and talk to them, but especially if you have children, it's not a good environment for you to be around."

Murphy seemed to imply that her baby screamed upon seeing her getting abused in the car.

"Although he's only 18 months [old], he shouldn't have to see that," she said. "If it's not safe, you have to [walk away] ... because more often than not, if it will happen again."

Last year, on the 20th Anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, Vice President Joe Biden called the issue "the most vicious form of violence there is."

Biden has been well aware of the problem for a long time, as he helped write the legislation as a senator. As ATTN: previously noted, it "provides greater funding for the investigation of incidents of domestic violence, and according to the White House, has lowered the rate of intimate partner violence by 67 percent since it's enactment."

During an interview with the TODAY Show regarding Ray Rice's NFL exit, Biden said: "It's never, never, never the woman's fault. No man has a right to raise a hand to a woman. No means no."

Biden told TODAY that colleges need to take care of their young female students as well.

"The next challenge is making sure, ironically, we get college presidents and colleges to understand that they have a responsibility for the safety of women on their campus. They have a responsibility to do what we know from great experience works. Bringing the experts. Provide people, give the young woman the support that she needs. Psychological support. the medical support, and if need be, the legal support. Societal changes taking place. It takes time. But I really believe it's taking root, and we have an obligation to just keep pushing it."

If you are the victim of domestic abuse, and are looking for help you can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.