The Differences In How Men And Women Look At Dating

February 14th 2017



An ancient text once wrote that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, suggesting that differences in gender put planetary differences between people.


While the whole world can agree upon gender equality, the differences in men and women are most pronounced in one arena: love.

As Match.com’s 7th Annual Singles In America Study shows, the way men and women look at dating are quite different and, in their own way, suggest that advancing gender equality is reshaping how men and women view each other. The results are fascinating—and could help you get a date.


Feminist women are changing the dating landscape.

The push for gender equality has shifted the role of women in relationships: women who identify as feminist are 78% more likely to offer to pay for a date, 25% more likely to initiate sex for the first time, and 95% more likely to take charge in the bedroom. These strong women are also more likely to be defined as confident, intelligent, and independent by both genders too.


Men are in love with finding love near home.

Perhaps because they are homebodies or just a little lazy, men are 28% more likely to want to date in their neighborhood. It doesn’t stop there either: single men are 102% more likely than single women to have a crush on a woman in their neighborhood. The guys could be onto something too considering 36% of millennials want to date someone who lives in their neighborhood. Why? Because they believe they’ll find more in common with that person.


Both sexes agree: put your damn phone away.

In a surprising twist given how interrelated phones, apps, and dating are, both genders agree that most types of phone usage during a date is a deal breaker: 75% of singles are turned off when phones are used on a date without explanation and 66% are turned off by texting during a date. Women are also more likely to judge a date if their phone model is older, if a phone makes annoying noises, and if a phone screen is cracked. Beyond this, Android users judge iPhone users and vice versa—but iPhone users are 21 times more likely to judge Android users negatively.


Women have the power (according to men).

When it comes to making moves in the dating world, men hope women will take the lead: 95% of men want a woman to ask for his number, 95% of men want women to initiate the first kiss, and 93% of men want women to initiate sex first. The reality stands in stark contrast to male desires though: only 13% of women ask men for their number, 23% of women initiate the first kiss, and 23% initiate sex first. Clearly the dating world offers an untapped opportunity for women to dominate men.


When it comes to sex, men want an emotional connection.

In a surprising move perhaps representative of shifting gender roles, men are 95% more likely to believe that emotional connection results in better sex. Moreover, men are 43% more likely than women to believe that sex builds emotional connections with partners. This notion is heightened for queer men too: gay men are 103% more likely to believe emotional connection makes sex better while bisexual men are 232% more likely to believe in emotional connectivity and sex.


Everyone agrees: equality is in.

Unsurprisingly, men and women both agree with what the whole world has been saying: gender equality is important. Over 90% of men and women believe violence against women is a top issue and nearly the same amount worry about rape and income inequality. What makes this matter most interesting is that men like dating feminists—and women feel more empowered dating as a result. This is a win-win for everyone!